


Warmer

by ClaraCivry (Kat_Of_Dresden)



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: (and he gets several in here), Angst, Credence Barebones Needs a Hug, Fluff, Food, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Past Child Abuse, Second Chances, also a sick fic now, niceness, with sick credence and helpful gang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-01 04:55:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8609554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kat_Of_Dresden/pseuds/ClaraCivry
Summary: Tina finds someone who should be dead on her way home and takes him in. Tina and Queenie kind of adopt Credence after finding him again. Decide to give him a real home.





	1. Chapter 1

Tina was going home after another exciting day in investigations, tired but not unhappy and really looking forward to getting to her apartment and finally resting when she heard something. It was almost inaudible, and probably would go unnoticed for others less observant than her. It was a soft sobbing, somehow.... familiar. It was a boy crying, and she knew who it was.

But that couldn't be, could it? That boy was gone, and this was probably just her imagination, or her guilty conscience, berating her for not having done enough to save him. Couldn't be. Of course it couldn't. Still, she couldn't take the chance - maybe there was someone else in need of help, maybe something had happened to them. Whatever it was, even if it was just a trick of her imagination, she couldn't simply walk away.

So she approached the source of the noise and found him on the floor, made a ball in a corner of an alley dressed only in rags, tear tracks on his hollow cheeks. She ran to him, forgetting the impossibility of the situation for a moment.

"Credence?" The boy his opened his bloodshot bright eyes and looked at her. It was definitely him. "How....?"

"Miss Goldstein.... I don't.... I don't know what happened." He said in a broken voice. "I remembered hearing your voice in that station... and that British man that was with you... and then... there was so much pain.... I felt like I... like I broke...."

Tina remembered the moment. It looked liked he'd been broken, too. He'd shattered in front of her very eyes, broke into thousands of tiny pieces, and yet there he was again. Perhaps he had needed to break to release that thing that had taken over his life for so long. Most people didn't survive for so long with that in them, but Credence was obviously not most people.

"How did you end up here?" She asked, carefully getting closer, not to startle him.

"I don't remember much after... I felt.... weightless. Like I had no body. And there was... there was no time, it stopped and I.... I woke up some time later and I was cold and I didn't..... He's still coming after me, isn't he?"

There was pure terror in his eyes and Tina's heart melted. She knew that this boy, or at least what had lived inside him, had done terrible things and yet... She couldn't help feeling for him. She magicked a blanket and covered his frame with it, hoping to stop the shivers.

"Why don't you come with me, huh? We'll get you some dinner and a nice bed to sleep in."

She carefully cleaned some of the tears on his face, slow and gentle, making sure he knew she was there and meant no harm. He was still shivering, cold, way too cold.

"You... you don't...."

"We won't hurt you, Credence. We won't give you to the Aurors or anything like that. I only want to help you, all right?"

There were more tears on his face, silent ones and there was pain and disbelief in his expression, while he shivered on the floor. Tina got even closer and embraced him softly.

"No more tears. It will be fine now. We will make it fine."

Tina took the shaking boy to her home, careful, oh so very careful. She didn't know how he could have survived and what might have changed. Maybe the Obscurus was gone, or maybe it was still there. The only thing that she knew what that this boy had lived through hardship and horrors almost unimaginable, had been abused, belittled, hurt, manipulated. It was enough pain for several lifetimes.

And Tina had already failed him once, she had no intention of doing it again.

Queenie was happy to help and between the two of them, they prepared a bath, some new clothes that would fit (with a bit more of colour that his old ones, a bit of dark green, to inspire some hope) and made a great dinner along with her sister. She knew the boy's story, she knew its (supposed) tragic end, and was glad to change it for a more hopeful one. Provide some shelter, a point of positivity amidst a world of darkness.

Credence hadn't spoken much since she took him from the street, just looked at them, uncertain. All of this felt a bit odd for him and he was concerned that it would go wrong, that he would ruin everything, like he always seemed to do.

"Of course we're not afraid of you, child! Stop worrying, you won't hurt us. Or anyone else, I bet. Those days are over." The blonde Goldstein said, smiling as usual. "Now come, sit on the dinner table, you haven't had a proper meal in so long...."

Credence felt a little overwhelmed. No, he felt absolutely overwhelmed and part of him couldn't believe this was really happening. His whole life, very few people had shown kindness and plenty had been cruel. He didn't remember his birth mother and his adoptive one had treated him even worse than the strangers that called him names and spit on him. Not even his sisters had seemed to care too much about him.

And suddenly, after a life lived in darkness and the most depressing austerity he was in a warm room, with light and colour, with people that smiled at him and a dinner with dishes he'd only seen in stores, or in the houses of more fortunate people.

Could it be true? Could the horror of his days with Mary Lou finally be over? Had life given him a second chance, one with less hardships and could he dare hope... company? Affection? A part of him was afraid that he didn't deserve all these good things, that he was every bad thing Mary Lou had called him through the years. That he deserved to burn in the flames of hell and he shouldn't get these nice ladies into trouble. But he felt so good in that place, so at ease...

There was a warmth everywhere, not just in the flat but also in the Goldstein sisters faces, in the nice clothes they'd lent him, in the food they had kindly prepared. A warmth that was absolutely foreign to him, but something he could get used to. Something that had been missing from his life since he had memory. 

For the first time in too long, he smiled, too, a tentative soft smile and felt a pang of genuine hope. Maybe it wasn't too late for him. Maybe even he could be saved. 

 


	2. Chapter 2

Credence had many nightmares, sometimes several in the same night, sometimes full-blown night terrors, that woke him and the rest of the people in the flat with his screams. He remembered being disembodied, dissolving into darkness and giving in to a mind that was not his own, and yet was part of him, who made the decisions for him. He watched people die, heard their screams, saw the terror in their eyes and knew that he had caused, that it was all his fault.

Sometimes it wasn't his time as darkness what haunted him, but his more regular life. Sometimes he dreamed about the woman who'd been his mother for most of his life, and dreamt that she came back for him and took him away, back to the horrors of that house.

She had convinced him that he was simply not good enough, that he was nothing but a useless, sinful waste of space, a mistake of a god that had forsaken him. Not worthy of the food and the shelter he was given, not virtuous enough to live anything good. Noth worthy of Mary Lou's attention and the hellish life he'd had. He felt it again – the shame, the disgust at his own self and his scarred filled body. He was a monster no matter what form he took.

But now he wasn't alone with his tears, or lashed for disturbing the others in the middle of the night. Now he had people who actually felt concerned for him, who didn't hurt him like he'd always been hurt for his many faults. Instead, when he had bad dreams, they brought him more blankets and cocoa and chamomile tea and whispered reassuring words and embraced him.

Queenie was specially fond of the hugs. More than one night Credence had found himself buried in the blonde's arms, trying to focus on the warmth and forget about the horrors he'd lived and that the dreams had made vivid and present. And she was happy to help.

She wanted to do anything she could to ease the boy's pain. She'd seen and felt what had been going on in his mind and it was heartbreaking. All that pain, all that horror, and how hopelessness hat painted all of his actions. She knew what he had done, or rather what that things had done, but still... It was so horribly unfair. Credence had chose none of that.

“You don't have to be sorry.” She told him, reading his thoughts. “I can go back to sleep anytime I want, it's not that important. Here, have some cocoa.”

Credence half smiled at the woman, a gnawing feeling that he didn't deserve any of this clawing at him.

“It's not about deserving or not deserving anything, child. It's about healing... about building one's life and having a fresh start.”

Credence wanted to say something, thank her for all of this that she was doing, for the kind words, for the support, but yet... His eyes were bright and there was a lump in his throat and he wished, as he'd done so often in the past, that he was stronger.

“What if I... what if I.... again...?” He couldn't find the words, but luckily she knew what the boy wanted to say.

“We'll find a way so it doesn't have to happen again. A way to make sure. In the mean time maybe you could help us around the house, run some errands?”

“I would like that.” Credence said, his smile still shy, but less rare now.

The next day he begun making himself useful, and trying, like Queenie had said, to start anew. He couldn't undo what he had done, wouldn't and shouldn't forget. But that didn't mean that he couldn't try and make up for it, for all of it, and enjoy the peace his new life with the Goldstein's could offer. He wanted to give back a bit of the hope and warmth that they had given him, somehow.

At the end of the week Tina and Queenie took their new adopted boy to one of their favorite places in the city: Kowalski's baked goods. It was always bittersweet going there and seeing that the man they'd lived an incredible adventure with couldn't remember them, but the it was nice seeing him having made his dream come true and the food was incredible.

Credence was in awe. They were never allowed things like the one Kowalski sold in his store, they had been out of bounds. If Mary Lou caught you with one such useless thing it was cause for the belt's use again, probably something between twenty and forty lashes. So Credence had never even considered it much, even though it looked tempting and delicious. He stared blankly at a new batch of pastries, and thought that heaven couldn't be much better than that.

“You seem hungry, kid.” Kowalski's kind voice said next to him, startling him a bit.

The baker wasn't wrong. Despite his new improved living arrangements, Credence had been hungry for a good part of the past fifteen years of his life. Maybe it still showed.

“Why don't you try one?”

The man was offering him a pastry, a beautiful fresh made cinnamon roll, still warm, with a smile.

The nightmares would be back, he knew. The darkness would forever be part his history, of his being. There was a chance that he'd never be able to see himself as anything else than a monster.

But in that place, on that rainy tuesday... life was good. Life was better it had ever been before, and Credence was grateful, for every tiny bit of understanding and kindness, for every last crumble of warmth.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and thanks for your feedback too! Hope you liked this bit as well! A bit of sugar is always a good thing, right? ;)


	3. Chapter 3

Newt was really glad to be back in New York after the adventures he'd lived there some months ago. Arriving on the ship once again, the city seemed even larger than he remembered, than the last time, more full of life. Even better than in his memories.

And indeed it was better in a way because he this time he wasn't going to be alone - now he had people to visit, people he cared about and wanted to see, be with again. He was really looking forward to seeing them all again and Tina's letter had made him specially giddy. Not only he'd be seeing her and her lovely and cheerful sister, but they had managed to find Credence again, make him somehow whole.

Newt was a rescuer and caretaker by nature, and he could never forget those he couldn't save. Helping living beings was the ultimately purpose of his life, what drove him - which made it even more painful when there was a loss. Every lost life hurt him, injured him, marked him. He didn't forget, couldn't forget. He always wished he could have done more, been there sooner.

That poor boy hadn't deserved such a cruel fate. He hadn't chosen to be taken over by a parasitical magical force, hadn't chosen all that abuse, hadn't chosen being manipulated because of his possible use as a weapon. He'd been a victim and one he hadn't been able to help. So knowing that he had managed to bounce back from MACUSA's attack and was putting those dark days behind him.

When Tina picked Newt up at the port she looked every bit as lively and interesting as he remembered her, but a tad more confident,more grounded. Maybe it was her new position as investigator, maybe it was all the things she'd lived in the last year, maybe it was something else. Whatever it was, it became her. There was a new light in her, something new and strong.

"You look good." Tina said, looking at the long-missed-Brit, stealing the words from his mouth. Newt just blushed and laughed nervously.

"I...uh...yeah..you too, I mean..."

"And hello to all of you too!" Tina said, motioning at the case. "Let's go to my place, Queenie and Credence are dying to see you."

"I do hope that's a figure of speech!"

Tina cringed.

"A bit unfortunate, maybe. Let's go!"

Queenie and Credence had indeed been looking forward to their reunion with the man, specially her. Queenie had to admit that despite being generally well-liked she didn't have many true friends. Probably because of her instinctive habit of prying into other people's minds. Most people didn't take kindly to it, and tried to stay away.

And Credence... well, he could count with the fingers of one hand the people who hadn't wanted to hurt him or use him in some way, and Scamander was one of them. He also happened to be a friend of the Goldstein sisters and he wanted to make a good impression, show him that he was better, no longer the monster he once was.

But of course, he was scared. The British man seemed harmless enough, but in the past other people had also tricked him with kind words and nice looks. Sometimes, the ones you suspect the least can be your worst enemies. Besides, Credence didn't know this man well at all, so he could turn out to be all kinds of trouble for him.

He was also afraid of the fact that this man could do some tests and decide that there was nothing worth saving in him. Scamander was an expert in magical animals, what if he studied him and decided that he was too monstrous, too dangerous and put him in a cage... or worse? He was just beginning to build a life worth living, if they took all that away from him now, after just a taste, it would absolutely undo him. So yeah, he was scared.

But Queenie kept reassuring him and telling him that it'd be okay, that Newt would be happy to see him, and maybe she was right. So Credence was desperately trying to contain the shaking of his hands and only half-succeeding.

"You have nothing to be afraid of." Queenie assured him, taking one of those shaky hands, trying to warm it up.

And there didn't seem to be.

When Newt arrived he was all smiles and nice words, and appeared to be genuinely happy to see Credence alive and well.

"It's incredible!" The ginger man said, after doing a quick examination. "It seems that your body used the Obscurus' mechanisms to make a host gas and used them to rebuild itself. At least, something good came of something horrible."

Newt smiled, and it was an awkward smile, but it had its charm.

"Do you feel it with you since you... reappeared?"

"N-n-no, not anymore. But sometimes i-it hides." Credence said, still not able to maintain eye contact for too long. What a pair they made.

"There's no way to make sure, but maybe I have something in my case to help. Come, come with me."

And so Newt stepped into his case and asked Credence to follow him. He did so, reluctantly. He didn't want to leave the safety of the Goldsteins' apartment but felt he had to.

And suddenly he was in a different dimension, one filled with impossible sights, impossible creatures and... the impossible all wrapped up in what seemed like such a small place. It was wondrous. Credence had never seen so much magic in one place. It was enough to make him forget about his past, if only for a moment. 

“Where are we?”

“These is where I keep my creatures. Some of them couldn't survive on the outside, others I found hurt and rehabilitated. Each one comes from a different place.”

Little by little, and as they through the different rooms that place had, Newt explained what was the name of each creature and a little bit of its history. 

“They are the most important thing in my life.” Newt admitted, petting a weird looking blue bird who was very content and made a purring kind of noise when its _mother_ touched it. 

“And you brought me here, after seeing what I did? Aren't you afraid I'll hurt them?” Credence said, taking a step back. He was bad news, a mistake of god, a formless monstrosity. He didn't deserve good things, and these lovely animals didn't deserve his unwelcome presence. It was wrong. He was stepping in a place that didn't belong to him, that should never belong to him. Precious things and vicious monsters shouldn't be mixed. 

“Do you want to hurt them?”

“No.” Credence said under his breath. “But I could.”

“So could they, if they wanted to, but I trust you both.”

“You don't understand, Mr. Scamander. I'm a monster. An abomination.”

“A monster is just a made up concept to make people hate what they don't understand. Every life has value, every life is a treasure on its own. Yes, Credence, even yours.”

Credence wanted to cry, again. It seemed such a small thing, such an obvious thing to say, to think to know.  _Your life has value. Your life matters._ Most people didn't need to be told that to know it, but Credence had been told the opposite so many times he'd convinced himself. (You're worthless, you're scum, you're trash, nobody would miss if you were gone, nobody will ever want you, you should be grateful that I care enough to discipline you, you are not special, you are nothing, nothing, nothing). 

And suddenly this man had come, taken him (HIM!) to his most sacred place on earth and told him he had value. That his life was a treasure. It was a bit too much. And said such nice things, and meant them. 

“You, you are a marvel, Credence. You managed to live with that thing inside you for longer tham what was possible and then managed to put yourself back together. You should be proud.”

Credence's eyes were bright, his heart felt warmer. 

That night, after playing with a bowtruckle and watering all kinds of vegetation. 

He had no nightmares that night. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Newt, as requested! Hope you liked this chapter too!   
> Next one could be someone from Second Salem coming back to haunt our boy + protective crew. Anyone interested?
> 
> Hope you liked, thanks for reading and remember to leave a token of your appreciation if liked! It makes all those tiresome hours of work of the week pass a little better! ;)


	4. Chapter 4

Credence was just running some errands, fetching some ingredients for potions and some more conventional groceries for the house. He liked being able to help the sisters and he was slowly understanding that he he was a part of that little household, and that he was allowed mistakes. Before, he would have been afraid of forgetting something, or being too late or too early because that would have meant punishment. But now the fear of punishment, of beatings, seemed unjustified. 

They wouldn't hurt him if he did something wrong. It made doing the errands nicer, almost pleasurable. He was allowed to make mistakes, he was allowed to make decisions. It was the first time, and he was savouring it. There was room for joy in nearly everything we did and he was slowly coming to terms with it. 

The people on the streets (the no-maj's, as the Goldstein's called and boy did Credence love to be taught all the nomenclature and anything magic related and were they Goldstein's happy to teach such an attentive and enthusiastic audience) didn't know about his involvement in any of the murders, of any of the havoc the darkness inside him had caused. 

They only saw a hunched boy with big sad eyes, who was exceptionally quiet. He was growing out his hair (everything that reminded him of his adoptive mother needed to go) and wore nicer clothes. With the added confidence that his new foster sister-mothers were instilling in him, things were looking up. 

But of course, the past has a way of catching up – and Credence's tempestuous one was bound to reappear. A relative of one of his victims recognised him – not as the Obscurus, but as the boy he'd been, Credence Barebone, the second salem boy. Because that man was none other than Mary Lou's brother from Boston, who'd gone to New York after not hearing from his sister in too long. 

When he got there, he found out that his sister had died in mysterious circumstances, and the only thing that he heard was that her kids had also mysteriously disappeared and scattered through the world. 

“I bet it was the boy.” One of their neighbours said. “The only thing that surprises me is that he didn't lash out before – one thing is discipline and another one is treating a child like a slave. He seemed harmless enough, but we all have our limits.”

So of course he set out to find the boy, only to find there was no trace of any of the kids. He did eventually find the youngest one, Modesty, but she refused to say anything. And after months of fruitless search he simply saw the boy in a bakery, buying some things. And the boy was alone and the bakery had some darkened alleys surrounding it. Good. 

It wasn't difficult to intercept him and pin the boy against the wall. Billy was a big, strong man with military training, and no match was a scrawny, frightened kid. 

“Remember me, Credence?”

Credence remembered him, of course he did, and he felt the panic overcoming him. The man had an iron grip on his neck and he dropped what he had bought. This was bad. This was so so very bad. Mister Barebone was obviously really really angry and drunk, and would anything to avenge his sister. 

What if... that came out? Would the sisters take him back again after killing someone else? And what if Mister Barebone disappearing brought a whole new set of problems for everyone around him? He'd already made Tina lose her job once, he couldn't let her down again. Well, maybe Billy would kill him (properly this time) and solve all his problems. 

Credence was losing control of his limbs, letting unconsciousness claim. 

“Let him go!” A vaguely familiar voice said in the distance. 

There was struggle and Credence fell to the floor. 

Jacob have seen a dangerous looking guy following the boy that normally came with Miss Queenie and her sister, and had been concerned. Even though he already had a line of clients, he left his assistant on the counter and went to check it out. 

The suspicious man was choking the boy, bloodshot eyes full of rage and the boy was just giving up. Without much thought, Jacob threw himself at the man and tried to get him away from the boy. The stranger was much bigger and stronger than him, but he couldn't just watch. 

Queenie apparated next to the alley, not even making sure that nobody had seen her. She'd heard Credence's panicky thoughts from afar, and had needed to do something. When she appeared some strange man with the mind full of alcoholic rage was fighting against poor Jacob whose only thoughts were if he was gonna make it alive and if the boy was okay. 

With a couple of well-timed spells (and making sure Jacob didn't see the wand), she threw the stranger against the opposite wall, mimicking a gust of wind and managed obliviate him of what had happened to his sister, the cause of his rage in the first place, and who Credence was. Maybe it wasn't the most legal thing... but MACUSA still owed her and her sister a couple of favours. Billy Barebone left the alley not knowing how he ended up in that alley and decided to get himself another, not sparing a glance to the people in the alley. 

Both Queenie and a still confused Jacob ran to each other, now that the situation with the man had been dealt with. The baker had some scratches on his arms and neck, but nothing important.

“I thought New York was safer than this!” Jacob commented. 

Credence was still trying to fight the light-headedness the choking had caused, his lips still bluish from lack of oxygen. The red marks from Billy's hands on his neck stood out against his pale skin and there was an added melancholy in his eyes. 

That night, he hardly spoke a word to Tina, Newt or Queenie. The brit asked him what was going on , and if he wanted to go down to his suitcase to pet some animals, feed some beasts. That always cheered him up when he had a heavy heart, he said. Credence politely declined, which only made them more concerned. 

Tina offered a friendly ear and the location of a secret place she went to when she wanted to think alone. (Sometimes Queenie could be a little bit... excessive) Credence was touched by the gesture, but also declined, wanting nothing but to get to bed and try to get of that feeling he got since the incident. A weight on his shoulders. While he lay awake on the bed Tina had conjured for him, he reflected. 

He was going to get them hurt, or worse. Graves had said that he was a miracle. His mother had called him an abomination. Most people had called him a freak. Whichever was right, it was clear that he was not normal, that his was in one way or another monstrous, and that his presence was damaging for everyone in his life. Mr. Kowalski could have been injured that morning, and it would have been his fault. And they still didn't know if that force that had shared a body with him could still hurt people.

There would be others that would come for him. The Second Salem had delegation in other places, sometimes they visited. Maybe they come to him too, asking him what had happened to Mary Lou. And the MACUSA would probably not be too happy if they found out if he was still alive and decided to imprison him, or kill him yet again. 

And maybe these people he'd grown to love would defend him, like Jacob had, but he didn't know if he was worth it. Maybe he should have died that day on the underground, or today on the hands of his not-uncle. Maybe he had it coming and he deserved it for hurting so many people... Maybe they would be all be better off without him. Maybe he should leave for their sake, to stop them from being hurt. Maybe he should do something to make sure he never hurt anyone again.

Something final. 

When he woke up the next day, they were all standing there, looking at him, in front of the bed. He backed away against the wall, instinctively. Fear was he his automatic reaction, fear that he'd done something wrong. Fear of punishment. 

“Don't be afraid, you've done nothing wrong. We just want to talk.” Tina said. “Make sure you know some things.”

“Credence, none of us would better without you here.” Queenie continued. “You're helpful, you're kind, you're incredibly grateful and it makes us happy to see all the progress you've made. You make us happy, all right? And you are most definitely not a monster and I want that idea out of your head.”

“You- you didn't know what would happen when you suppressed your magic.” Newt offered. “No one could – you just wanted not to punished so much, and that's perfectly understandable. It wasn't you fault or your choice anything that came afterwards. But it was your choice staying in my case to- to make sure everyone was okay after it fell to the river, or when feeding the most lonesome creatures without taking notice of their odd appearance. That also you.”

“More people will come.” Credence said, trying to control his feelings. “I don't want you to get hurt because of me.”

“We'll try not to get hurt then. But will stand there, by your side, each time.” Tina said, stepping forward. “If they do come, they'll have to face us first. If I could turn back time I would lose my job all over again to defend you. Jacob would probably throw himself again at that man. We will always defend you, is that understood?”

Credence nodded and they hugged. 

Maybe he wouldn't leave. He'd stay a while. 

Queenie read his thoughts and smiled. 

“Now, let's get some breakfast!”


	5. Chapter 5

Credence hadn't appeared for breakfast, but Queenie decided to let him sleep. He'd been having a lot of nightmares lately, because of his encounter with his foster uncle. He'd been shaken up pretty badly. It had brought back many painful memories.

So she decided to let him rest for a few hours – if he was not screaming then he was probably getting some much needed (and much deserved) rest. She would leave him at it. His thoughts seemed a bit jumbled and disconnected, but she didn't heed it too much thought, it was probably just because he was sleeping. She went out, ran some errands, had a nice cup of coffee in a beautiful place near the flat. It was a nice day, if rather uneventful.

She went home for lunch and found herself alone for the first time in a long time. Newt was in the South with some creatures, Tina was still working and Credence was still in his bed. It was nice, for once, to be able to hear herself think and not be overwhelmed by the presence of other. A nice breather that she welcomed – after so much company. She didn't have time to start feeling lonely, as Tina came home earlier than expected.

They talked about some things, organised the rest of the week, caught up on work and friends and things like those. Then, before they realised, it was time for dinner, and Queenie decided to call their sleeping guest. Not only she was getting worried about how long he'd been sleeping, but he also couldn't skip any more meals.

When they found him, he'd been severely underweight, nearly starved. They didn't know if it was something that happened because of the time that passed between his disappearance and reappearance, but they were pretty certain that even before that Mary Lou hadn't fed him much. In fact, they first time he ate with them, he waited on the table while the others ate, and when they asked him why he said that he was only allowed to eat what the other's had left. Always the last, only leftovers. That boy had broken their hearts in a million different ways since he'd got there.

“Credence?”

Queenie called, and then let herself in. His thoughts were still pretty mixed, and there was some confusion that was new. He fully awake but not fully asleep either, and he didn't really know where he was, who was calling. He just flinched when he heard the voice, made himself a ball and closed his eyes further, coughing hoarsely, trying to get some air in and failing.

Mary Lou always hated it when he was sick, and she always hurried to get better, to walk it off, to stop whining. A couple of times she had decided that he'd got sick on purpose to avoid chores and had beat him because of it, too. Sometimes Modesty came by, brought him a glass of milk or asked the one of the pharmacist's kids to please get her some medicine, but Credence told her to stop, or she would get in trouble.

So he was normally alone, cold and at home with sisters that weren't supposed to help her and a pissed off Mary Lou. That on top of how poorly he felt and the occsional thoughts of how easy it would to be die and how no one would miss him. His body and his mind both fighting against him. He didn't who was calling him, but he had no strength to face them. He'd been feeling horribly the whole day, coughing and feeling he couldn't breathe after being too long in the snow the previous day – but he didn't remember that. In that moment, his mind was a haze of cold and shivers, and horribly vivid fever dreams.

Queenie realised it the moment she walked in the room and saw him: he'd slept so much because he was ill. Even under the covers she could see that his face was even paler than usual, his hair was plastered to his forehead with sweat, and there was an unnatural red in his cheeks. And those terrible sounding coughs. The covers had been thrown away at some point and then recovered, and they were a mess, as was his pyjamas, all buttoned up wrong. Sympathy overcoming her, she sat on the edge of his bed and put her hand on his forehead.

“Oh, honey, you're burning up. Why didn't you tell us you were sick?”

She was going to punish her, wasn't she? Because he'd spent too much in bed and he wasn't that bad anyway, _some honest work for once will do you a world of good, you little slacker..._ He tried to get up but his limbs felt terribly heavy and there was a voice hushing him.

“Now, young man, you don't move a muscle from that bed. Look at me, focus on me.”

Credence's bright shining eyes did as he was told, and tried to recognise the person who was speaking. He didn't exactly remember her, but she made him feel safe, somehow. He relaxed a bit, somehow feeling that Mary Lou's threat wasn't so bad if Miss Nice-calming presence was around.

“That's it, honey, you calm down and rest. You let us take care of you.”

And so he let his head get down and the nice-safe presence help him be comfortable. His fuzzy fevered head still wasn't too sure of where he was, and wondered if this was just another of his dreams, like when he dreamed about doing magic and being with other magical people. Yeah, it was probably just that, just his imagination, but he was going to enjoy it while it lasted. Having someone take care of him, as if it mattered if he lived or died.

Queenie could of course hear all those thoughts coming from the boy's exhausted head and decided to be extra careful and extra affectionate to try and erase those “I don't matter” thoughts. She tucked him in, caressed the hot-cheeks and made the mission of the rest of her day to make him feel better. She put a cold compress on his forehead, made him some chamomile tea, sang some lullabies.

The next day too, they were extra careful around him, even called a doctor. He diagnosed Credence with a chest infection, an old one he'd had some time ago and never fully cleared. He prescribed him some medication which wasn't cheap, but they didn't care. Credence was more aware of his surroundings that day, just a bit surprised that they were doing all of that for him. He was so unused to being shown genuine affection his mind kept wondering what they would make him do in return. Queenie kept reassuring him that the only thing he had to do was get better.

It was comforting, but still a bit unbelievable. That they appreciated him enough to do all that... he probably didn't deserve half of it, but he was weak, tired and drained of energy, so in that moment, didn't care that much about that. And they weren't the only ones, either. Jacob found out when Queenie went to get some muffins for the sick boy, and made him a whole thing of chicken soup. Newt sent a get well card with a vial of tears from a animal which was supposed to be a natural remedy for breathing problems. It was all like a dream, a very nice dream.

Five more days he spent in that bed, sometimes getting better, sometimes worse. Queenie and Tina stood by him through everything, the endless bouts of coughing at night, the fever spike and the delirium, all that annoying wheezing and changed all those sweat filled sheets and pyjamas without asking him to do anything.

And they all kept asking how he was feeling, and whether he was comfortable and if they could make something to make him feel better. Sometimes, Credence cried because he felt overwhelmed. But he didn't want to cry, he was happy. They made him happy. For the first in his life, he didn't feel like if he died his death would be inconsequential and no one would miss him. Suddenly, he was allowed to be sick, but not allowed to die.

“Of course you're allowed to be sick, honey. Just don't do it too often – we get worried.”

“T-thank you.” He managed to croak out, despite his sore throat. This was important. Queenie drew a warm smile.

“You're thanking for being worried?”

“Nobody ever was.... before.”

Without thinking it too much, she pulled him into a hug, trying to make up for all the other times he was sick and had no one.

“Well, that was before - now you'll always have us to worry about your well being, honey.” She said, clinging to the boy. “You deserve this and so much more.”

 


	6. Chapter 6

Everything was wrong.

The teacup fell and broke into a million little pieces.

Credence felt as if it was his life that was breaking as well, at the exact same moment and in the exact same way. That teacup had broke his remade, rebuilt life. It was one of the beautiful and quite probably expensive (maybe even appreciated) items of the house was broken, totally shattered, and it was completely his fault. The teacup had fallen because his hands had been shaking – he was to blame.

All that these people had done was provide him with delicious food and drink, shelter and clothes better than he could ever imagine and spend supplies on him, gave him far more than what he deserved. They had been awokened by his screams at night more than once, hd to put with his crying and cowering, and tried to help him with his fears, and this is how he repaid them. Breaking their belongings.

He braced himself for what was coming, for the end of that beautiful peace period. Yes, they may have been very lenient in the past, very understanding with everything and told him he didn't deserve to be hurt. But now they have to punish him, there was no other choice. He had destroyed their property and that was an important offence, worse than not finishing chores on time or forgetting about an errand. They couldn't just let it slide, and they wouldn't.

He wondered who would be the one to punish him of the people who lived in the house. It was probably going to be Tina, she was the one that had more authority in the house. What would she use to punish him, magic? It was sad that he'd let them down and ended the good thing they had in that household. Credence was terrified that the force inside of him would take control of him again and hurt them. He really really didn't want them to get them hurt – it had been his fault, all of it. He messed up and only him deserved the consequences.

Credence wanted to scream or cry but he was frozen in that place, in the same spot where he had dropped the teacup, staring with bright eyes at the mess he made, at the destruction he'd created and that would bring the end of that period without pusnihments. And he couldn't blame anyone else, this was all him.He was as worthless as Mary Lou had said, a waste of space, useless, dumb.

Maybe it was in his blood like he had heard so often in the past. Perhaps Mary Lou had been right to call him an abomination and there was nothing natural about him. The monstrosity was too prominent for him to to hold on to a normal life. He probably deserved all of this and more – nothing good, never anything nice.

He shouldn't have had hope. Hope of a normal, hope for love and affection, hope of never being afraid again. But he'd had it and now he was going to pay with his new life broken in little pieces. Hope is your enemy. If you can't fix what's broken, you'll go insane.

Silent tears made their way down his cheeks as he continued to stare at the mess, frozen, hands shaking badly. Cry, monster boy. It's the only thing you were ever good at.

“Aren't you coming back?”

It was Tina, appearing suddenly in the kitchen. She found him like that, tears on his face, unmovingly staring at his broken cup on the floor. There was horror and sorrow in his tear-filled eyes, and he wouldn't meet Tina's gaze.

“I bro-bro-broke it.” I'm so.... I'm so.....I'm sorry. I didn't m-mean to.” Credence's voice came in broken whispers.

When she approached him to try and reassure him, he flinched and took an step back, obviously terrified of what was coming. Tina sighed, sad, being painfully reminded of the boy's traumatic upbringing. Yes, they had taken a few steps forward in the last few weeks but they still had a long way ahead of them.

Tina sighed, never really knowing how to handle these situations.

“I'm not going to punish you, Credence. I won't hurt you. It's okay.”

His eyes shifted a bit, still sad.

“Who....?”

“No one will hurt you. No one.”

“But I broke it.”

“We all break things – accidents happen. Doesn't mean we have to hurt people because of it.” Credence was less stiff now, and Tina smiled warmly, trying to make sure that all of her body language made sure that he was safe there. She kept her distance despite her want to reach out, trying to avoid any lashing out. “And besides, you can still fix it.”

Credence's demeanor changed completely.

“I can?” There was relief in his tone... almost hope. If he could fix the cup then there would be no need for punishment, no need to this beautiful dream that he'd been living since he arrived to the Goldsteins' house.

“Sure.” Tina smiled again and summoned the wand they'd picked up for Credence earlier that week.

“Here. You need to move the wand like this, point it at the teacup and said say clearly _Reparo.”_

Credence hesitated and didn't get it right the first two times (because he stuttered, mostly) but managed to get it done right the third time.

_"Reparo."_

He watched in amazement as all the pieces gathered and cup mended itself, to end up looking as good as new. The horror was over – the teacup was whole, he was whole, his life was not shattered.

“I fixed it.” Credence said, still wanting to cry, but tears of joy this time.

“Yes, you did. Thank you, Credence.”

“I fixed it with magic.” The one thing that he had fought against so much, the one thing that had made him feel like a monster, now he had used it for good. There was nothing monstrous about repairing something broken, and he'd done it, with magic. His own magic had not destroyed, but repaired.

He picked up the cup from the floor and left it on the counter, still amazed.

“You'll be a great wizard if you keep practicing, you'll see.” Tina said, with her warm voice.

And so, with the threat of punishment and the bitterness of disappointing her gone, Credence looked at Tina and she opened her arms and they hugged.

“No one will hurt you here, Credence. There are always better ways to deal with things. I know it will take a while for you to fully believe it, but I want to hear it. You are safe here. You are safe with us.”

And, in that moment, everything was right.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked and thanks for reading! Poor boy, somebody needed to help him.
> 
> Could be continued with Jacob and his pastries and returning Newt if you want to
> 
> If you liked, please do leave some fedback! ;) It is inmensely appreciated


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